me replying to the first post, WTF HAVE YOU BEEN SMOKIN.

WORK, YOU c*nt
Inspired by John Barton
Written, composed, published and distributed
By Bruce John McLaren
UNITING CHURCH ELDER
A POEM BY
BRUCE MCLAREN
Email bruce.mclaren @ hotmail.com
(02) 9982 4907



8 Carden ave Beacon Hill nsw 2100
Lay preacher and Sunday school teacher St Stephens Uniting Church
Life member of the Gideon society.





A guy called Winer once worked for himself
On a contract agreed to by him
Where he had to do lawn mowing
For a firm called Kutting King

But he soon found out to his dismay
Too many people did not pay
So how could he pay back the business loan
Lent to him by John Barton

So he stopped work after much talk
And away from the contract he did walk
He said he couldn’t make a dollar
“Neither can I,” John Barton did holler.

Along came little Herbert Porter
Paying off his bricks and mortar
“You can buy in” said John, “read this contract
And make sure your solicitor you contact.”

He did, then said “Here’s how I feel
I sounds real good, you’ve got a deal!”
But soon our Herbert with dismay
Found the people did not pay.

Said Herbert, “This isn’t working the way you said
How can I get out of the red?”
“I can’t help, you’re on your own
Work, you c*nt to pay back Hudson’s loan”

It doesn’t matter if you have strife
With Patricia because she is your wife
I lost a wife, you can too
Or lose you house, it’s up to you.

100 hours a week will do
Work, you c*nt and see it through.
And don’t complain ‘bout 100 hours
That’s what I do Work those mowers!

So Herbert felt he had a choice
To lose his house or lose his wife
As neither choice had much appeal
He chose to walk out on the deal.

He couldn’t wait for John to pay
John had no money anyway

“Get back to work, Porter” John said
“Don’t’you know my dear Mum’s dead
And you stopped me from going to Tamworth
Work, you c*nt, for all you’re worth!”


When Herbert didn’t go back again
Bruce McLaren got the blame.
Bruce should have said (to H), “This isn’t funny,
Go back to work and lose more money!”

“I can’t spend more time”said Bruce
My family thinks that I’m a goose
For spending so much much time for you
Without any thanks for what I do”

“Work you c*nt, work like me
That’s the way it’s gonna be!”
“Work, you c*nt, work more Bruce
Or you’ll get more verbal abuse”

As many will tell you, I’m a very nice bloke
The trouble is I’m always broke
And never had a holiday
And that’s why I behave this way.

That’s my excuse, it should be enough
People on me have been too tough
They should know when I scream and shout
It’s their fault for never taking me out.

When I’ve been so good to others
When it’s their turn to help they hide under the covers
Ive been so good to Herbert and Bruce
And all I get is their abuse.

So they should help, I’ve helped them so
More that anyone can know
Particularly to Bruce I’ve been so nice
I even mowed his garden twice!

Yet he’s done nothing back for me
Except for giving me lots of money
And lots of time (I paid for some)
So why on earth is he so glum?

Work you c*nt, work more Bruce
Or you’ll get more of my abuse
Work, you c*nt, you owe me true
I’ve really done so much for you.

Bruce says that I lie, that I’ve told dozens
Including lies ‘bout Constable Cousins
He says my business principles are few
And that I’ve cheated others too.

How can he say such things about me
I’m ’honest John’ –it’s clear to see
I do not chat, or lie, or steal
I give everybody a good deal.

“What about Winer and Porter?”Bruce says with derision
“When they were running the Service Division.”
“Those c*nts didn’t work, don’t you know?
What’s wrong with you” Are you slow?”

“Work, you c*nt, work like me
That’s the way it’s gotta be.”

When my ex-wife Joyce disobeyed my directive
I decided to pay a private detective
To follow her wherever she’d go
To show her that I love her so.

She still didn’t come back
And that’s the fault of Mac
Who should have sought her out, by golly
Dragged her back by the hair like I did with Molly.

And Peter Wood didn’t do a thing
Yet he held on to my wedding ring
When I didn’t pay for no results
He simply went away with the sulks.

How dare he expect me to pay?
Peter, go home and play
With your doodle like I do
If you don’t like it you can sue.

I could go on and on it’s sad
About Dee Why Police who say I’m mad
Centrelink and ATO
RTA and GIO

But this is where my story ends
Bruce and I are no longer friends
Because two c*nts just didn’t work
I think I’ll go missing persons ‘back o’ Burke.”